Arranging adult dates with swingers who really want to play
Join No Strings SexArranging the adult date
Imagine a few weeks from now. You have put a lot of effort into creating a great adult dating profile. You have established yourself as a popular online swinger and chatroom favourite. You have carefully crafted out some really great messages and sent them out to swingers who match your preferences. You've read the replies and entered into follow up correspondence with several promising adult contacts. You've exchanged telephone numbers with several swinger couples. The time has come to make some calls and arrange some adult dates.
Prepare before you make the call
Before picking up the phone, read over the other person's (or swinger couple's)
adult dating profile go over all the correspondence that has already taken
place between you. Prepare a set of questions based on the profile and have
this in front of you when you make the call. The other person is going to
be much more impressed with someone who wants to find out a lot about them
as opposed to someone who tries to dominate the conversation.
You also need to have prepared some very specific ideas for the adult date
you are trying to arrange. Although you must always be flexible and give
serious consideration to the other person's suggestions as to where and
when to meet, there is a high chance that they will need the ideas to come
from you, so make sure you have several well thought out proposals ready.
Ensure that you are phoning from somewhere that you will not be interrupted,
that the television is switched off and there are no other noises or distractions.
Avoid getting an answer-phone response by checking out in advance what time
to call. If however you still get one, be very discreet about the message
you leave!
Good swingers open with discretion
When the other person answers, your first question should be to check that
it is actually the person you thought you were calling. Apart from the possibility
of you having misdialled, there is always the chance that the telephone
line is shared with a flat mate, or other members of the family. Be especially
wary of this possibility when you are calling a swinger couple because you
may find you are talking to their teenage son or daughter!
Introduce yourself with a bit of humour. Some ice-breaker like “Hi,
I’m the swinger who’s been sending you all those naughty messages
/ photos” etc
Follow the introduction up by confirming exactly why you are calling. This
might sound like stating the obvious but it ensures that the call doesn't
digress into pleasant but irrelevant conversation. You are making the call
to arrange an adult date, so say what has attracted you to the other person
(or swinger couple) and why you want an adult date with them.
As you ask your questions, throwing in the occasional flirt to keep the
conversation light and on track, ensure that you listen carefully to the
replies you are getting. Tune yourself into the various changes in the other
person's tones of voice. These can be more revealing than the actual words
and phrases used. Remember that you are trying to build a swingers bond.
Do this by asking follow-up questions that demonstrate understanding and
try to match the voice tones that the other person is using. At all times,
show a deep interest in them as an esteemed person and not just as someone
who might provide you with some adult fun.
Making the adult dating proposal
Listen intently for cues that will tell you the right time to get specific
about the meeting arrangements again. When you feel confident that you are
receiving the right signals and get a suitable cue, make a proposal to meet.
Ensure that it fits in with the things they have been telling you about
themselves. Proposing a rendezvous on a Saturday evening when the person
has already told you that their shift work pattern or difficulty finding
baby sitters prevents them enjoying a social life at the weekends, would
show that you had not been paying attention.
The way you phrase the proposal is also important. Make it as likely to
lead to yes as possible. Without sounding too much like a salesman use the
“which would you prefer” technique. For example; “I was
thinking about Friday around 8 o’clock or would you prefer to meet
a bit later?” Sound upbeat and confident when you ask. Don’t
let it sound as if you are desperate.
If they respond by saying that they are unsure about being ready to meet,
then there is little point in pushing it. Do not take
rejection personally and use it as a positive experience from which you
can learn more skills and techniques to use in the future.
If the response was a positive one you need to confirm that you have understood
correctly and feel really enthusiastic about meeting. Repeat back the agreed
arrangement by saying something like; "Fantastic.! So that's 8.30 on Saturday
the 12th, at your place. Can I just read back the address to you so as to
ensure I've got it right?"
After you have agreed to the adult date, you should devote the rest of the
conversation to preparing the ground for the adult fun you want the meeting
to provide. Keep things light hearted and use your flirting skills as verbal
foreplay to create sexual tension. By the time you reach the end of the
call, the other person should be sending you clear signals of what the meeting
is going to be about and provided you are what your adult dating profile
claims; sex will definitely be on the agenda.